When the fear of getting peed on isn’t the worst part of a job

The least appreciated I ever felt as an employee was when I worked in mental health.

Trauma-informed care that was residential youth in crisis, to be specific.

And yes, the job was hard. I never knew if I was going to get punched in the face or peed on on any given day. But the worst part wasn’t the work. It was management.

You would think that that level of stress would have had the leaders trying to find every single possible way to appreciate and retain their staff. You would also think that that a large mental health organization would have the resources to train and support their leaders.

But unfortunately, that was not the case.

Although never getting peed on after having many clients use this as their go to move feels like a victory. 🤣

The truth is, I never felt appreciated because of the way feedback was delivered and the culture of communication. Yes, I would get the occasional token of appreciation or kudos. But I would also get feedback that made me feel like I was the worse employee ever and that everything I know is wrong.

Feedback causes A LOT of stress and anxiety for both the person giving and the person receiving the feedback. While oftentimes it is seen as a way to get better, the way it’s delivered can make or break a person. Seriously, there’s research that says feedback causes social pain, which lights up areas of the brain associated with pain!

When this sort of continual environment of negative feedback is ongoing, it then creates a toxic culture.

Toxic cultures inhibit employees abilities to do the job well. And I was no stranger to this. I got wrapped in the culture and was not my best self to my coworkers or in my attitude of how I approached the job.

And when toxic cultures are the overall theme of a workplace, any sort of employee appreciation will always feel like popping an Advil that masks the pain but doesn’t relieve the root of the problem.

That’s why it is so crucial to have leaders trained in proper leadership techniques. If a computer technician was never trained in how to fix a computer, you wouldn’t blame them for not automatically having the skills to do so, right? The same goes for leadership.

If you have never been trained in how to be a leader, it’s not your fault if you don’t know how to give effective feedback and appreciation, promote employee wellbeing that boosts productivity, or communicate and lead like a visionary.

That’s why I’m here. I’m here to support you on your leadership journey and to make sure that no one has to consider the most horrific part of a job, like getting peed on, as a better option than facing their boss.